Just before our three-year wedding anniversary, I was devastated to learn my husband and I were headed in completely different directions. The pain and betrayal I felt initially numbed me completely. The day after I learned the entire truth about our marriage I found myself outside kneeling in my garden planting the plants I had purchased a few days before this big revelation. I didn’t know what else to do with myself and the plants needed to get in the ground. I went to work with vigor and determination. After planting all but one of the ten or so plants, I was finally down to the last plant. What was I going to do after this? What was I going to do with myself? How was I going to handle all the things I had learned in the past twenty-four hours?
Then it started. A deep, primal sob began rising up through my abdomen and into my chest. It erupted into a gasp for air. It felt as though my breath had been knocked out of me. My body, racked with pain and involuntary shaking, surrendered to the sobbing. I had never experienced this before. I could not catch my breath. Panic began to surface as the thought, “What if this never stops?” raced through my mind. As my abdominal muscles clenched tighter, I remained huddled on the ground, my arms wrapped around my body, my chest to my knees. Without thought, I breathlessly whispered, “Oh God!” through my tears. It was a cry for help. I couldn’t imagine how I was ever going to get through this heartbreak, humiliation, and grief.
I felt something wrap around me. It felt like the light brush of air you feel when somebody walks past you quickly. But this air, this…energy, completely surrounded me. It was hugging me. As though enormous Angel wings were completely encompassing me. The sobbing stopped. The intense pain dissipated. My breath slowly came back to me. I stood up silently and walked to the house with peaceful automation. I felt I was being led inside, and I watched in an almost out-of-body experience as I went to a phone book and opened the yellow pages to family counselors. I saw two options. I read the first one, some of the pain came back into my abdomen, I moved to the second option, the pain went away. I dialed the number for the second option. A lady answered the phone sounding distracted and in a rush. I told her my marriage was in shambles and I needed to make an appointment. She said, “I am the counselor here and the lady who usually takes appointments for me is out for lunch, but I believe my next opening is not for two weeks.” Silently I thought in despair “Two weeks? I don’t know what to do with myself in the next two minutes!” Then the counselor said, “Actually, I’m going to move my Two O’Clock this afternoon. Can you come in then?”. Relief flooded through my body as I gratefully agreed. I know now, the Angels were working with her too. Thanks to the guidance I received that afternoon from the meeting with the counselor I was able to take steps towards gaining a sense of security I thought gone forever.
I knew the Angels were helping me again. This time I was determined to listen to their guidance. From that day forward the Angels gracefully showed me how to navigate one of the most painful and difficult periods of my life.